The ABC Happiness/Life Grade Tool

The-ABC-Tool ‘A’ is for Awareness!

The ABC Tool is a rather quirky but powerful tool I created to remind us to always be living from awareness – or at least invite us to remember that we can always choose.

We can think of it as akin to the English and American school grades system, A, B+, C-, etc., but with a twist, observing which of three philosophies or approaches we may be operating from in any given moment.

Grade C: 70% of the Western World’s population lives at the tribal or ethnocentric level of development or lower, making the ‘center of gravity’ of Western cultures one which is termed by developmental psychologists as ‘conventional’. In this society we do things because ‘that is the way it has always been done’ – often regardless of whether it makes sense or not. There is an element of approval and expectation here, where rather than operate from choice, you are largely expected to fit in and operate from social convention.

Grade B: Beyond that however, some people say “Sod that!” to that, and learn that they can work with their own belief systems, to challenge the conventions and expectations of their own culture, and see if any other belief systems suit or serve them better. Maybe you read a book or several which showed you how, rather than being limited by your existing belief systems, you can be empowered to change them. This gets one much closer to genuine choice and authenticity. But it still has a limitation and potential ‘unconscious’ aspect…

Grade A: Belief systems have their limitations in that they close down our awareness as we ‘trust in’ the belief system, rather than operate from our own awareness in the moment. Awareness always trumps belief systems, however, as they incorporate the information of our belief systems, but in a looser way which also allows us the additional – and most primary – information from our immediate awareness or knowing (see also The “Is That a ‘Why’ Question?” Tool). Any kind of conclusion or ‘locked in’ belief shuts out our real awareness.

Here’s an example. We try tomatoes and mozzarella at our local restaurant and like it. We lock in the belief system that we like this food and that it makes us happy to eat it. So we choose in advance to eat it the next week, and lock out our awareness when that day comes of the fact that actually we are not feeling in the mood to eat it.

Another example. Maybe we lock in the belief that Resort A is safe and that Resort B is much more dangerous, and going to Resort A ‘relying on the safety of our belief system’, we lock out our awareness that actually we don’t want to be going there today because there are certain signs the subconscious has picked up that it is not safe right now.

One more example. We get some great work done. So we lock in the belief that we will finish it tomorrow and complete a great piece of work. But maybe, when tomorrow comes, we focus on this pre-determined conclusion of what we are to do, and lock out an awareness of an even greater possibility to do something different to contribute to the business, and complete the task the following day, with both elements in the bag.

To put it another way, when you operate from awareness you never miss a trick. And you never constrict the fulfillment of your own, truest desires because you have sought sanctuary in belief systems, conventional or otherwise.

The ABC Happiness/Life Grade Tool: “What ‘grade’ of happiness and effectiveness do I want to be scoring in this moment of life? Am I living in this moment from (C) conventional expectation, (B) belief systems or (A) awareness? Which of these do I choose to be living from right now?”